Monday, September 28, 2009

Happiness Is...


having a husband that makes sure you always have a supply of Ben and Jerry's Phish Food in the fridge.



Love you, bambino.

Monday, September 21, 2009

8:00

We have a new ward (church congregation, if any of y'all aren't hip to the LDS lingo. Which is cool).

We love our new ward.

Our new ward meets at 8:00 AM.

We do not love that our new ward meets at 8:00 AM.

Dallin thought he would love it. I thought it might be nice.

I was wrong. And so he was wrong. Because if I'm not happy, he's not happy. And I have made it quite clear that it is very difficult for me to be happy at 8:00 AM.

Ok but seriously. Lots of people claim to really love the early church thing. And hey, I'm sure some people actually do love it.

But you know what? I feel like a lot of people "love" the early church thing because it "gets church over with." No one will ever say that to you, of course. They'll say, "Oh, I love having church early! It just gives you the rest of the day to...." and then they kind of trail off to leave you wondering about how they spend the rest of their day when pesky church is "over and done with."

Not that everyone feels that way. I mean, maybe no one does. Maybe I just dislike early church so much that I can't imagine anyone genuinely liking it.

I can see how it could be an excellent start to your day...

but not if you're just so crazy tired (possibly from not being able to really sleep? Not that I currently have this problem) that you can't really focus on the meetings/lessons.

And not if having that "tired start" makes it so you don't want to do anything when you get home besides crash for an abnormal number of hours, making the rest of the day all but completely wasted.

And not if the early morningness makes you be unjustly cranky to your husband, which hurts his feelings, which hurts your feelings, which makes you cry.

Simply stated: Early church makes me very tired. Tiredness makes me unfocused, lazy, and something akin, in manner and sound, to a witch.

It's not like it's physically impossible for me to get up early. I really can get up early if I need/want to. (Shush, Dallin, dear.) And it's not like I'm going to stop going to church because it's too early. That would be quite the waste of the past 1,100 (give or take) Sundays of my life.

But really, I'll be glad when it's January and our schedule changes. Sundays are too important to not be enjoyed.

Thank you. That is all.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

I Dreamed a Dream

So...I keep having this dream.

I mean, I've had it like, 5 times in the last couple months.

Which, really, is pretty often for a dream.

Although, I guess it's not really the exact same dream every time. More like, variations on a dream theme.

Whatever it is, it freaks me out.

So like I said, it's a little different every time. But the serious weirdness always begins with me showing off to someone all the fantastic, brilliant movements that my fantastic, brilliant baby is making. What's weird, though, is that in the dream, you can always really tell what's pushing against my belly- baby's foot, baby's face, whatever. Like, really tell.

**Side note: I've heard that some people actually can tell things like this. Whoever you are, you are magical. Everything is a lump unto me. Which, I guess, is good, because apparently I'm terrified of being able to really tell. Side note over.**

Anyways, after a few "Oohs" and "Ahs" over this, the freakyness grows exponentially. Most of the time, what comes next is my showing someone my baby's finger...which is sticking out of my belly button. This is never especially weird to someone...we always just ogle over the cute little finger with the cute little fingernail.

But then...more of the baby starts coming out. Like, I'll pull out an arm. Or a leg, or sometimes, the whole baby! And not through my belly button, either. Oh, but also not through the place where babies normally come out, thank goodness. At least this dream, as weird as it is, is rated PG (for thematic material and disturbing images). But no, I pull out the larger parts through some suddenly appearing opening in my stomach, like all that was keeping it closed in the first place was a little overlapping skin.

Ew.

Anyway, the point is, the dream always ends with my going too far in showing someone the baby. I end up pulling her out completely and not being able to put her back in. And yes, in my dream, baby has always been a she-baby. Usually, the person I'm showing (it's been my mom more often than anyone else) doesn't think it's too weird that I just pulled the baby out of the front of my stomach, although she does usually make some sort of comment on how I shouldn't have done it, baby needed to grow more, but hey, you have a baby now!

It's weird. I really don't like having this dream.

So, anyone want to psycho-analyze me? I love making up crap to psycho-analyze other people's dreams.

I'm not sure what my shrink self would say to my wanting-to-be-shrunk self, however. Maybe..."You live in constant fear of giving birth." Or..."You're worried about having your baby too early." Or maybe even..."You really wish you were having a girl...today!"

To which I'd reply, "Doc, I don't think I'm really thinking any of those things."

And shrink self would say, "Do not argue with your subconscious!"

And, I guess, I wouldn't have anything to say to that.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Attention Oreo Lovers

I'm not talking to the casual Oreo eater here, people.

This is for Oreo LOVERS. Like, Oreos are as common in your pantry as cereal or pasta or bread. Or you've had Oreos for breakfast before.

Yes, those people. I am looking for you.

I have noticed something about my Oreos as of late. You must know that on a typical Oreo, both sides of the cookie have an imprint on them. It looks like this:



This nifty little design is usually on both outer facing sides of these delectable cookies. Am I right? Of course I am.

Well, in the past (ahem) couple of packages I've bought, there are some cookies that follow this traditional pattern, but then there are OTHER ones that (are you ready for this?) only have this pattern on one side.

The other side?



Blankety-blank.

And THEN, take the cookie apart, and...



The pattern is not gone, it's just facing the cream! So the cream gets on the cookie, and there's a little design imprint in the cream, which I would take a picture of... but (a) it would probably be pretty hard to see anyway and (b) I'm already amazed that Dallin hasn't looked over here to see me taking pictures of my Oreos on the computer. I'm still trying to convince him that I'm normal. It's taking a while.

So anyway, I'm wondering...have I just bought (ahem) a couple of defective packages, or have you other Oreo lovers noticed this too? Why are only some of the cookies put together this way? If this change was made on purpose...why?

Why? Why? WHY?!

And why do I care?

Friday, September 4, 2009

What a Boy Wants

So I have this picture frame:



I've had it for quite some time now...I can't even really remember where I got it! And I've never used it. Only recently did I pull out the stock photos of couple smiling happily and bowl-haircut child.

But...my crafty dafty self (note: I am neither crafty nor dafty) came up with what I think is a pretty cute idea for this as of yet neglected frame. Since anyone that comes into our house will automatically be drowned in pictures of us anyway, I thought of spelling out some cute/inspirational/lovey type word by decorating 5 pieces of paper, each with a letter on them. (Can you see it? Can you see my vision? Well I can.)

So anyway, my problem has been, what word do I put in there? At first I was all excited because I thought there were SIX openings in this lovely as of yet neglected frame of mine, and I could spell "family" or maybe even "Harris." But alas, there are only five frames, for five letters. Bummer, dude.

So what five letter word do I put in? "Dream?" "Laugh?" "Faith" is out because we already have a wooden cutout thing that says "Faith." I've also thought of putting "Home" or "Love," and then filling the last square with either a paper heart or just one picture of us or something.

Well, like any believer in teamwork, I asked my husband.

"What's a five letter word that you like?"

Ok, maybe I could have told him what the five letter word was going to be used for. That might have helped. But then, of course, hilarity would not have ensued. For after contemplating this for a little while, Dallin answered, quite resolutely,

"Bacon."

And I laughed. And he didn't know why. So I told him, and he laughed too.

Maybe we'll put it in the kitchen.

Or maybe I'll choose a different word.

Dallin does really like bacon...

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

It's September.

It's SEPTEMBER.

This scares me to death.

I am scared for the following three reasons:

(1) It's SEPTEMBER and my baby is due in NOVEMBER.

(2) It's my little sister's birthday today and she is no fewer than EIGHTEEN years old.


(3) ASU football starts on Saturday.

Let's take these backwards...it'll be kind of like a countdown thing. It'll be fun.

(3) ASU football starts on Saturday.


If you wonder why I am scared about this, wonder no longer, for I shall explain all.

First of all, an ASU football game can make or break a Saturday night. Last year, lots of Saturday nights were broken. Crushed, really. Shattered, if you want to be frank about it. No, it probably wasn't the worst season ASU football has ever seen...but it might have felt like it. And now, me and every other ASU fan in the world has absolutely no idea if this season is going to be any better. Sure, our lousy quarterback graduated...but now we're left with a starting quarterback with hardly any play time under his belt. Yeah, ASU football hasn't had two consecutive losing seasons since like the 40s...but that might just mean our time has come. We do still have some big guns in our possession (Williams, McGaha, even Weber)...but we have a few more that are simply unproven.

Needless to say, my realistic hopes are approaching on their tippy-toes. We should win on Saturday...it would be incredibly embarrassing if we didn't...but the rest of the season may just have a dark cloud of doom hovering over it. I guess we'll see.

2) It's my little sister's birthday today and she is no fewer than EIGHTEEN years old.

I'll tell you what...wow. See, since there are six kiddos in my family, I've always kind of mentally divided them between the elder three and the younger three. Jenna is the oldest of the younger three...and she's 18.

18 is adulthood.

She's an ADULT? Wha-wha-wha-what?

Also, freaking out about this kind of makes me feel like one of those old aunts who can't say anything about you other than how big you are and how she can't believe how much you've grown, blah blah blah. Does anyone actually have one of these aunts, by the way?

At the risk of becoming that, I'll stop now. I love you sis! Happy birthday!

Now go get back in your footie pajamas.

1) It's SEPTEMBER and my baby is due in NOVEMBER.

We're in the "BER" months, people. September and November seem a lot a lot a lot closer to each other than August and November. Tell me I'm not right.

Can we say...freak out?

Furthermore, I am approaching the 30 week mark. 30. Weeks.

Do you know how long it takes a baby to cook? 40. 40. Weeks.

30 is almost 40.

Everything after 30 is really almost 40.

You get beyond 30...and you have...numbers of weeks left with only 1 number in them. Like...9.

Yeah, my baby's due in like almost 9 weeks. Gulp.

I should learn how to be a mom. That might help.

I should also buy some things...like a crib and some diapers (AHHH! CLOTH OR DISPOSABLE?!?) and some more clothes and a breast pump (tmi? lol. sry.) and some blankets and some bath toys and some make-your-baby-brilliant movies and a stroller and a diaper bag and oh my gosh baby needs a name!

Ok but really, I'm not freaking out this much. I still have a shower coming (probably second weekend in October...let me know if you want an invite! They haven't gone out yet...), and I'm not exactly Miss Workaholic right now, so I've got plenty of time to peruse stores/the internet looking for smoking deals on the cutest slash very most necessary baby items.

But still...there's a lot to do.

P.S. about the names...I think we've got it narrowed down. Maybe I'll write a post in a few weeks about all possible options, and then let the blogosphere decide for me! Yeah...probably not. But I'd at least enjoy the validation - genuine or not - about my name choices.

Baby's kicking/rolling/punching up a storm. I've been feeling sickish and am hoping it's pregnancy related and not cold/flu related. Dallin finally felt him while he was being really active (Dallin's felt him before, but never while he was really on the move) and said "So that's what you have to deal with?" Yeah, that and then some, babe.

Finally, and just fyi, I love juice. I am about to finish my fourth carton of juice in like, a week. Mmm...it's so yummy!

Wake me up when September ends.